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27 December 2003

ADHD

Stupid Evil Bastard has a very interesting piece about living with ADHD/ADD. It is called ADD and life with constant medication.. His situation is not exactly like mine. However, it is very similar with regards to the way I feel about medication.

LIke him, I lived most part of my life without medication and I did reasonably well. I now take Ritalin, be it slightly irregular since I usually don't take it during weekends and holidays, and it is sometimes hard to tell what it does for me. I can sometimes say that I don't feel the differenc but then other people will tell me. Andon days where I feel like i am perfectly normal, Jane will ask me: Did you take your Ritalin today? Others notice it more than I do.

Which brings us to the question: Should I take it for me or for others aswell? When I am so loud and unconcentrated that it bugs others (for example, after a day of hard work when they are tired too), should I take my meds because MY behaviour makes it hard for others?

Oops, being unstructured again.

I'm not fond of the idea of having to take this pill every day just so I can focus my attention a little better. It's too much like relying on a crutch when I should be able to just do what needs to be done, but [...] I can't deny that it is a big help.

Indeed. That is exactly how I feel. How come other people can say things better than I can?

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