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Being a Widow

My experience of dealing with grief as a widow


About Jane's brain tumour journey: Astrocytoma.co.uk

24 January 2004

On being gay part 3

In my Quest to explain to some people what it means to be gay with everything you do, here is part 3.
I am looking for a room in Leamington Spa, England. So a lady contacted me, saying she has a room available. Reasonably priced, she even comes with a little boy to help me practice for when I have my own:) I am seriously interested in the room. The price is good, the timeframe is good, the location is good......
And then, for some reason, I feel the need to tell her I am a lesbian. And I mail her, telling her I am gay and that if that is a problem for her, would she please tell me and I will look elsewhere for a room.

You can argue: you did not need to tellher that. It doesn't matter. But it does. What if she hates gay people? What if I am moving in, my girlfriend stays over for the night (she mentioned not having trouble with my boyfriend staying........) and she tells me to move out because she does not want her son to be exposed to such filth......that would be even more painful than asking her now and getting rejected.

I am hoping it won't be a problem. But the simple fact that I felt the need to make sure she doesn't mind reminds me again that those straight people who say that being gay is no longer a problem in today's society are all very very wrong. I have a coming-out almost every day, if I want it or not. And I am not even 'the most overt lesbian' around. There are lots of people who don't expect me to be a lesbian. Well........as few:) But I wonder what it must be like for some gay men and women who really 'look the part'. They must have it even harder than me sometimes.

I am feeling sad right now. But the sweet thing is that I called my dad to sort of get it off my chest. And he was almost pissed off at society that his daughter had to even mention that. My parents are just so fabulous. They are everything a lesbian could ever wish for. In other areas there is room for improvements of course........:)


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